How to Live a Life High on Adventure and Low on Regrets

I know a little something about living an adventurous life.  I’ve hot air ballooned over Yellowstone, roamed the outback of Alaska for two weeks after being dropped off by a floater plane on an alpine lake, gone paragliding in France, slept in a hut in the middle of the Amazon river, laid my eyes on ancient scrolls at the British Museum, trekked the 120 mile Haute Route of Mont Blanc, hiked the Salkantay Trail to Machu Picchu with nothing more than a sat phone, compass and map, caught a Blue Marlin in Bermuda, heard the roaring thunder of waterfalls and avalanches, looked up at the Northern Lights, and booked a one way ticket to Germany after dropping out of high school. 

I’ve been published in magazines and competed in many sports. I owned my first real business at 26. I spent much of my teenage years living in a trailer at the stable of the US Equestrian Olympic gold medalist as a working student. I’ve had major health scares and major heartbreak. I’ve slept in 5-star hotels, caves, and once paid a Peruvian to use her chicken coop for a night.  I’ve drank a beer in Prague and laughed with a table of strangers. I’ve read many stories that allowed me to float down the Mississippi with Huck and Jim,, mourn with David Copperfield when Mr. Murderstone became his father, and stroll down Swann’s Way.

And I have to tell you – it’s been extraordinary.  If today were my last day on Earth, at age 28, it would have been an absolutely amazing, brilliant, beautiful life. And it’s all by creation and choosing how you want to live out your days. You don’t have to be rich.  You don’t have to be exceptional.  If you want to experience it all, you just have to make a few decisions. And these decisions are hard decisions. They make you question the very core of who you are, but ultimately lead to living a life full of peace, hope, wisdom, and adventure.

1. Keep an open mind to new ideas and experiences. – Accepting some level of risk in life is important.  You cannot be both close-minded and wise.  You have to open up to the unknown.  Close-minded people who pretend to be wise to the ways of the world are mostly just cynics.  Cynicism masquerades as wisdom, but it’s the farthest thing from it.  Because cynics don’t learn anything.  Cynicism is a self-imposed blindness, a rejection of the world that occurs when we’re afraid it will hurt us or let us down. 

2. Follow your heart and intuition. – Don’t be pushed by your problems.  Be led by your dreams. Live the life you want to live.  Be the person you want to remember years from now.  Make decisions and act on them.  Make mistakes, fail and try again.  Even if you fail a thousand times, at least you won’t have to wonder what could have been.  At least you will know in your heart that you gave your dreams your best shot. 

3. Be honest with yourself. – Be honest about what’s right, as well as what needs to be changed.  Don’t play the victim card EVER. Be honest about what you want to achieve and who you want to become.  Be honest with every aspect of your life, always.  Because you are the one person you can forever count on.  Own your choices and be willing to take the necessary steps to improve upon them. 

4. You don’t need anyone else to complete you. – There’s far more to life than finding someone who will want you or getting upset over someone who won’t.  There’s a lot of important time to be spent discovering yourself without begging someone to fall in love with you along the way… and this journey doesn’t need to be empty or painful.  Become a whole being on your own.  Go on adventures, explore your passions, wander around a new city, talk to strangers, sit in coffee shops and read, buy yourself gifts, leave notes in library books, dress up for yourself, give to others who can’t pay you back, smile and have fun.  Do all things with love, but don’t romanticize life like you can’t survive without someone giving it to you every second. You can. 

One of my favorite quotes is by Queen Elizabeth I (how my dog, Lizzie, got her name):

"I am called the virgin queen. Unmarried, I have no master.

Childless, I am mother to my people.

God give me strength to carry thismighty freedom.

I need no other. I am myself."

5. Be brave enough to be vulnerable and humble enough to ask for help. – So many of us feel alone, even when we’re surrounded by friends and family. Embracing your vulnerability is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and friendship and personal growth – the life experiences that require you to be the most vulnerable. Don’t ever think that you are in this alone. All you need to do is ask.

6. Persevere through tough times. – Sometimes what’s meant to break you just makes you brave. Call it growth. Call it finding yourself. Call it whatever you want. The key is to live moment to moment when times are tough, and push forward, until moments become minutes… minutes become hours… hours become days… days become weeks… weeks turn to months… and time again has meaning… and life becomes a reason to smile. 

7. Make goals. – Life is short!  Now is the time to get real.  Now is the moment to make a commitment to experience the life adventures you want to experience before you die. Choose 5 adventure goals that you’re most excited about.  Pick one that you will do within 3 months, one that you will do by the end of the year, one within 2 years, one within 3 years and one within 5 years.  

8. Live with no regrets. – This one is simply an amalgamation of the previous seven and then some. Follow your heart.  Be true to yourself.  Do what makes you happy.  Be with who makes you smile.  Laugh as much as you breathe.  Love as long as you live.  Say what you need to say.  Find the courage to feel different, yet beautiful.  Find it in your heart to make others feel good around you regardless of differences.  Know that you don’t need many people in your life, just a few great ones, so don’t lower yourself and your standards for the wrong reasons.  Be strong when things get tough.  Recognize when you’re wrong and learn from it.  Appreciate all the things you have.  Celebrate your small victories.  Forgive. And let go of the things you can’t control.