10 Excuses We Tell Ourselves To Avoid Change

When I first moved to Atlanta in May 2015, I never saw it as my permanent city. Atlanta was close enough (3 hours) to home so that I could be near my family, but it was only intended to be a five-year plan. After which I would move out west, I told myself. Earlier this Spring, it hit me that 2020 was approaching, which would make it year five of being in Atlanta, and I wasn’t any closer to being out west than I was in 2015. Something had to change. I had made attempts to move earlier, but always found excuses for why I should wait.

The mind is a wonderful thing. It’s also an excuse-making machine that frequently tries to convince us not to take actions we know are good for us. And this prevents many positive changes from taking place in our lives.

So why does the mind mess with us and make irrational excuses when we are trying to do things to better our lives?

Because the mind wants comfort, that’s why. It’s afraid of discomfort, pressure and change. The mind is absorbed in its comfort zone, and anytime we try to stretch that zone too far, for too long, the mind tries desperately to get back to ground zero at any cost—including sacrificing our long-term health, happiness and success.

Fortunately, I’ve learned how to identify when my brain is trying to make excuses and can usually call myself out. Here are a few common “excuses” I have heard from myself, training clients, friends, and family.

Excuse #1: I can’t do it.

It seems too difficult at first, so you think you can’t stick to the positive change you’re making. You don’t believe in yourself enough to take another step. This is a common excuse that can be countered by looking at the fact that other people no more capable than you have done it.

Excuse #2: They can do it, but that doesn’t apply to me because it came much easier to them.

Just because someone else can, doesn’t mean you can, right? You look for reasons they can do it but you can’t—maybe she’s an internet entrepreneur or freelance writer because she has no kids. Maybe she had some endurance junkie background, so she naturally is a better cyclist than I am. Maybe she doesn’t have all the work and family obligations I have, or has a supportive spouse, or doesn’t have bad knees. Ok, fine, it’s easy to find excuses: but look at all the other people who also have considerable obstacles and have done it anyway.

Excuse #3: I’m stuck because I don’t have enough time to make changes.

Have you ever met a happy, successful person who regularly avoids responsibility, blames and points fingers and makes excuses for their unsatisfying life? Me either. The truth is, you write your own destiny through the choices you make every day. You become what you repeatedly do. It is more important to know where you are going and why, than to get there quickly. Think about the difference between was is urgent and what is important. Most of us spend too much time on urgent things and not enough time on important things. Do what is important first.

Excuse #4: It’ll be too hard because I can’t get by without _____.

Fill in the blank: I need my wine, my cheese, my sweets, my TV shows, my ten hours of sleep, my big house, my fancy wardrobe, etc. These are luxuries we convince ourselves we can’t live without, so we can justify not making positive changes like eating healthier or exercising daily or saving money or simplifying our lives or building a profitable side hustle. And like I said, I’m not immune either—in the past I’ve made these excuses myself, but they all turned out to be lies. I didn’t need any of these things in my life and believing that I did was only getting in the way of the positive changes I was capable of creating for myself.

Excuse #5: Life is meant to be easier and enjoyed more.

Sure, I agree that life should be enjoyed (as most people would) but the problem is that the idea that life should ALWAYS be easy and enjoyable is used to justify all kinds of lazy behavior. Might as well sit on the couch and scarf down those cookies, because hey, life is meant to be enjoyed, right? Nope. You can do without junk food and still enjoy life. You can exercise and enjoy it. You can give up a lot of comfort in your life and not lose a thing. In fact, the path of least resistance is often the path of least reward.

There is no substitute for doing the work. Meditate on this every day: “I will do the work. It won’t be easy. It will be worth it!”

Excuse #6: I deserve a reward (or a break).

We all deserve a tasty treat, or a day off. I’m not saying you shouldn’t give yourself a reward or break when one is deserved. But if you make this rationalization a primary rule for living, you’ll always be on a break. You’ll always be giving yourself rewards, and never adhering to the original plan. Here’s what I do instead: I see sticking to my plan as the reward itself. I see reaching my goals as a gift I give myself. Going on a long ride isn’t the thing I have to get through to get a reward—the ride is the reward.

Excuse #7: I can do it later.

Sure, you can always do it later… but your later self will feel the same exact way. Think about it: Why should your later self be more disciplined than your present self? There’s no reason. In fact, because you’re allowing yourself to slack off now, you’re building a habit of procrastination and actually making it less likely that your later self will be more disciplined.

Excuse #8: One time won’t hurt.

This lie is so tempting, because it’s somewhat true: one time won’t hurt. Like Sunday night when Monday you get to “start over”. Unfortunately, it’s never just one time. One time means your brain now knows it can get away with this excuse next time too, and the next “one time” leads to another, until you’ve completely fallen off the wagon.

Make a pact with yourself: never believe the “one time” lie. If you’re going to allow yourself a scoop of ice cream, decide this beforehand and build it into your plan—“I will allow myself a single serving of dessert once every weekend” and stick to your plan, rather than deciding on the fly when your will power is weak.

Excuse #9: I’ve already failed too much.

You’re only human. If you break down, it’s fine. Just don’t stay down. Rest, and then pick yourself up so you can go to where you’d rather be. Mistakes make us wiser. Failures help us grow. Hope keeps us going. And love is the reason we’re alive. Keep learning, loving and living.

Excuse #10: It’s too late now.

Honestly, nothing is too late until your tired heart stops beating. If you’re reading this right now, congratulations, you are alive, which means it’s not too late for you. Things can change if you want them to at any age. Right now, you can choose differently and make something new happen. Your future is immediate. When you come up on a roadblock and are faced with the choice of sitting down and doing nothing or doing something to make further progress, choose the latter.

Think, work, and climb if you have to.

Move your life forward.